This thought is from Sister Patricia - I can not claim this insight for me own, although I often toy with this thought process. How many of us - walk around feeling out of control and just a tad grump - never realizing that in truth we are feeling like victims... Here is an excellent insight as to what might be going on within your soul.
Sister Patricia from Joy Notes:
I would like to share with you a huge breakthrough I discovered for myself a little bit ago. I have been reading a book called, ["Finding Your Way Home" - Freeing the Child Within and discovering wholeness in the Functional Family of God] (as you probably know I'm slightly unfunctional so these books are important to me). Anyway it is a very good book. It was talking about the three different ways that we sometimes handle other people in unhealthy ways.
1. Controllers
2. Rescuers
3. Victim
Well, the first two ways - I've found myself doing lots of time.. BUT I never thought of myself as going the "Victim" route. Well, lo and behold... all of a sudden - something clicked and I thought. THAT"S IT! For the last few weeks I've been feeling pressured (no doubt from all the preparations for St. Clare, book, internet, radio, life) and feeling on the high side of grumpy about the whole thing. Then through different stuff I have been working through - the answer suddenly came. The reason I am angry is because I am feeling that someone else put me in this position. I'm dealing with stuff that other people have planned for me. And Guess What? Nope. All this stuff is the result of choices I have made.
Most of the time when I am angry or upset about something it comes from stuff within. On good days things don't faze me a bit... but on bad days.... it's "Ready on the right, ready on the left, Fire!"
So its seems the exact opposite - that anger and frustration at others comes from being a victim (or thinking one is) but it really is. When I realize that "Hey, I made these choices" "This is stuff that I chose to do." Then all of a sudden it makes perfect sense that the person who can change all this "IF" they want to--is ME!
Not too sure if I am getting this across - but when I realized that I was dealing with pressures that were self-inflicted - the pressure sort of evaporated! It was like, "Oh yeah, I did want to do that!"
It was my choice to become a Poor Clare.
It was my choice to work on the Internet.
It was my choice to do radio.
It was my choice to write books.
It was like... Oh my gosh, I am so in control - even though I feel out of control!
People who are victims feel that there is nothing to do - but complain, moan and groan and endure. People who are not victims do the same stuff but FEEL very different about it. Isn't that interesting? Now we shall see if I stop complaining? Time will tell on that one! I think maybe complaining has gotten to be a habit.
Blessings of Peace and All Good!
Sister Patricia
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Wednesday, August 13, 2008
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