Oh say it isn't so...

Not yet two, Elsa now responds to most comments and requests with ...

WHY?

It's time to change your diapers, Elsa.
Why?
Because they are stinky.
Elsa gets up to change diapers.

Elsa, lets go eat.
Why?
Because it's time to eat.
Elsa gets up to go eat.

Elsa, put your book up please.
Why?
Because I want you to.
Elsa puts book on shelf.

Thankfully she has not yet advanced to Emma's level of why...

Emma: "Momma why is that boy crying?" She points to the little boy behind us in the check out line at the doctor's office.
Momma: "Oh, I guess he is sick."
Emma; "Oh, why is he sick."
Momma: "I'm not sure. I guess he got some germs."
Emma: "Oh WHY? WHY did the little boy get germs Momma?"
Momma: "Ummm, maybe he didn't wash his hands?"
Emma: "But why didn't he wash his hands Momma?
Momma: "I don't know Emma, why do YOU think he didn't wash his hands?"
Emma: " I don't know Momma, Why, why didn't he wash his hands, why is he sick Momma?
Momma: Sighs heavily and wishes little boy had washed his hands and was not sick and was not crying and trys to change subject. "Look Emma, there's a picture of pretty girl with some kittens."
Emma: "Oh she is pretty. Why does she have three kittens Momma. Why?

Now that I think about it, I guess I know why Elsa now says why to almost everything I say or ask... she is spending too much time with her big sister Emma. Read more!

What makes Momma a nice momma?

Emma: Momma, can I have some candy pleeeease? Pleeeease Momma?

Momma: Emma! No! It's too early in the morning. You still have to eat your breakfast. What kind of momma would I be if I gave you candy before breakfast.

Emma: A nice momma! A really nice momma!

I was tempted... very tempted. Read more!

Have I become disposable?

Recently Elsa, not quite two, climbed up on my lap and wrapped her arms around my waist, leaned into me as if to cuddle. Then she quickly rubbed her face back and forth rapidly. She stopped, flashed a grin at me and then quickly rubbed her face back and forth once more against my shirt. Seemingly satisfied with this quick cuddle she slid off my lap and was off to play once more.

Puzzled, I wondered if perhaps she liked how soft the shirt was that I was wearing. Then I glanced down and all was revealed. I had simply been used as a kleenex... Read more!

This afternoon as I addressed an envelope with notes, drawings and some stickers that one of my younger children was sending to some friends of hers in a nearby town, I thought to myself 'why don't I surprise their mum with a note'? After all, the kids are enjoying receiving mail in the mailbox; why should they be the only ones to enjoy this? Of late, my children have been receiving mail from friends who live in various states and that satisfying rip of the envelope simply can not be reproduced by clicking the mouse and seeing a number representing how many emails you have. Then I thought why stop at one friend, I have a few friends that might enjoy that nice feeling of a thick envelope that does not bear the address of the local utility company. And why, I asked myself, should my pretty snowflake stamps be wasted on only bills? Why not also use them to grace an envelope bearing good cheer and happy tidings?

I pulled out a stack of unlined paper and searched my desk for the pen that had just been there and began. There was a very satisfying feeling as blue letters flowed across the page and I found myself writing:

"I decided to write to you the old fashioned way, with ink and paper" and as I wrote that a thought struck me. How can this actually be so old fashioned when only a few short years ago this was still the principle means of communication, after the phone of course. Following this was another thought - will it soon come to pass that relatives will no longer find bundles of letters tied with a faded ribbon, forgotten in an old desk that had belonged to Grampa? Will instead our descendants find lost and damaged hard drives kicking around in the dusty corners of attics or basements, with only the most intuitive relative thinking that there just might be communications saved on that ancient piece of machinery. And, if they are able to retrieve anything at all off that hard drive - will they be letters, or saved emails and chats?

I love this era of emails and instant messaging, as well as the ease of being able to backspace when I realize I have left off an e, or missed a word entirely. I was not able to easily remedy these mistakes as I wrote my notes to a variety of friends this morning. But while I appreciate the wonder and practicality of this modern means of communications, it has dawned on me that if I do not make an effort to send the occasional "snail mail", and unless I save and print off most of my emails to my children, extended family and friends a valuable piece of family history will be lost.

Not even this blog is assured of perpetual existence. Thankfully I have saved most of my articles that I have written, but already this piece of our family history is divided between two hard drives. Should I print them off, tie them with a ribbon and stick them in the far corner of a desk drawer? Or perhaps I should download them onto a CD and carefully preserve them this way? And unless I label the CD and the jewel case carefully; should a great granddaughter find what will surely seem, to her, to be an 'ancient' means of keeping information, she might decide throw this useless old CD out.

However, if I print off the essays and articles I have written, even if the ink has faded and the paper yellowed and the dust causes her to sneeze uncontrollably; that faded ribbon will signify to her to that something of value is wrapped within. Read more!

Mid Week Post!

Elsa: "Heavy breathing as she reaches up and grasps mummy's neck. Grunts with effort to heave herself up onto mummy's lap. "
Mummy: "Feels like Mount Rushmore, eh? Getting up here!"
Elsa: answers with a breathless "Yeah!"
Mummy: Wonders if skipping the bike ride this morning was such a good idea after all, given Elsa's quick yes! Then quickly comforts herself with the thought that a 22 month old does not know, after all, what Mount Rushmore is. Read more!

How goes your day...

...when the majority of your children become ill and you have not yet managed to route them all through your new doctors office that insists on "well check ups" before your children fall ill.

Mine goes something like this:

Wake up squeezed between coughing, hacking babies and roll quickly out of the way of the one gaging on the mucus in her throat.

Get partially dressed, opting to stay in jammie bottoms to save time.

Organize cleaning party with those still healthy enough to clean, so as to clean up from supper last night since everyone was too tired to clean up last night.

Blow a kiss good bye to husband as he escapes to the office.

Call and cancel visit to friends house, realizing that bringing this plague to their house would be a good way to wreck a blooming friendship. Promise to pray the Rosary at about 2 pm when we would have been able to pray together.

Smile admiringly as proud son shows you the large bowl of pudding he has just finished whipping and then swallow back sarcatic remark when the bowl flips over and out of his hands. Whince as he lifts the bowl up and try not to think about how much milk is sitting there in that large dark chocolate mountain, slowly ebbing from the kitchen floor out onto the dining room floor.

Chase down 20 month old and with help from other kids wrestle her to the ground so as to change her and while you are at it - clean her nose.

Plug cell phone in so it can charge while you wait for the Doctor on call to call back - for your 20 year old son. You haven't dared call the pediatricans office yet to try and determine which of the ones who have not yet had their well check ups can actually be seen.

While in kitchen spooning up jello and pudding for those too ill to swallow anything thicker than liquid you miss cell phone call from Doctor because somehow the setting on the cell phone has switched to auto voicemail after 2 rings. Maybe the fact that the 20 month old is forever pushing the buttons on the phone can explain this mysterious change in settings?

Call office back and ask if the Doctor would mind calling again...

Chase down 20 month old again, and with help from other kids wrestle her to the ground so as to change her and while you are at it - clean her nose - again. Jump back when she gags on mucus....

After fielding second call from a very patient Doctor, you get a call from your husband asking if he should still go into the hospital for his out patient proceedures scheduled for Monday as his throat is starting to hurt. You pull out paperwork and look up reasons for postponing - there in bold letters is "fever, sore throat, cold symtoms."

Sighing, you offer to call the hospital for him and several calls later the surgeon decides that your husband should continue fasting and call in the morning if he is not feeling better, at which time he will call in antibiotics in case he has Strep like the 20 year old son does... but please, if possible, do not call during church hours... Hmmm, I actually liked that, so I asked what time he attended church and duely wrote it down.

Chase down twenty month old and beg her to eat just a little of the chocolate pudding you have served her. She looks at it and than looks at you and says "catpoo!" You offer her butterscotch pudding and meet with success until she gags on more mucus and decides she is full.

Later, much later, you remember to call husband and tell him to keep fasting. Your 20 year old reminds you that his prescription is still waiting to be picked up at the pharmacy. Thankfully you remember, as you grab the keys off the mantle, the decision you made early this morning as a time saving mechanism and go change into a pair of pants before leaving...

So how was your day? Read more!

Who needs an electric blanket...

...on these cold nights, when I have two cuddle bugs each competing to see who can crowd the closest to me. Come Spring, though, with its warmer temps - I am sure I will have a completely different view of this double blessing! Maybe I will pull a Danielle trick and ask; "Where's Daddy?" Read more!

"Our feelings are hurt!"

"Mummy", Anna asked, "Do you know what Emma says these days when her feelings are hurt?"

No, I replied.

"Our feelings are hurt!"

"Oh?" I laughed, "She has begun to use the royal we?"

"No," answered Anna. "The first time she said that I asked what she meant by our feelings, and she said; mine and Jesus' feelings are hurt cause Jesus lives in me!"

But thinking in retropsect I concluded that it is a royal "we" of a sort. After all, Jesus is king of our hearts and minds, is He not? Read more!

Money makes the world go round...

Our young adult son recently mused aloud to himself, after spending a few hours opening a new bank account in order to save on monthly fees; "I wonder why I worry so much about having a bank account when I almost never have any money to put in it?"

I am afraid that at 45 - I could ask the same! Read more!

two posts just waiting...

...for finishing touches. Hopefully by tomorrow!! But now I need to peep in on Jack Bauer in season two and find out what happens to Kate! When last I saw her, she was stuck ina trunk and Bauer and a co-hort were being fired upon in a back alley. Shhh!!! Not a word. I'm leaving right now to see what happens. I mean it - not a word!

Shhhhhhh!!! Read more!

What do large families drive?

No doubt most of my readers have read what Danielle and her readers have had to share about what kind of vehicle large families choose but in case any of you have not see the comment that took the prize click HERE. I am, almost, seriously considering getting one for us, especially if I can find one that does have a glass partition between the driver and passengers. Read more!

An excercise in twirling ...

... can be dangerous as one son learned Friday night. It can lead to a trip to the ER, a neck brace complete with cat scan as well as making a donation of five vials of blood to the lab resulting in the discovery that his diet could use an increase in bananas as he is very low in potassium.

Several hours later with a Frostee in hand, head still thumping with pain, said son returned home with his mum and following Doctors orders, both mum and dad stayed up all night watching season two of 24 so as to be able to wake aid son every two hours so as to ask him his name, age and rank, oops sorry that's Jack Bauer who answers those questions.

And given that mum2twelve is operating on so little sleep there is little more that she can say at this time! However, I can tell you that this son is recouperating well, and while he can not remember the fall he does not feel inclined to engage in such a twirling contest again. At least, not anytime soon. Read more!

One more prayer Request

Please pray for Jen and her family's tragic loss.

Read more!

Prayer Request

Please pray for X... (not the mother in the above posting) who is being induced this evening and is very worried about being induced. It is her third baby but her first induction. Please pray for her unborn baby.

Please join me in my pleas to our Mother in Heaven for her to place her mantle of protection over X. and her precious unborn baby. Ask her for her prayers for X. that the Holy Spirit will fill her with peace, strength and endurance.

Please also pray for her providers and her birth coach.

Thank you all for your prayers!
Read more!

So much to say and so little time

There is so much I have to share, both funny, serious and spiritual, but so little time to say it in.

I am plogging along in my studies for the DOULA certification. So far the books that I have been reading are meant for midwifery, even though on the required reading list.

I have a personal prayer request for all who read my blog. My husband, Hugo, has applied for two jobs, one locally and one in Columbus. While I hate the idea of moving, I do really like Columbus, but as much as I like Columbus, I hate the idea of leaving two adult childrne behind in the South, esp my daughter who is about to embark on married life. So I think I would prefer the job here in nearby Charlotte. But it is hard to believe that we will even get a response to the resume and letter, never mind an interview! We have just had such a difficult past five years that it is hard to believe that something postitive will come our way. And that thought is a perfect introduction to my spiritual thought.

Most, no, all who know the difficulties of the past five years are simply astounded by all that has fallen on us. It is hard to understand the why, so we have come to the conclusion that it is better to focus on acceptance. But it is very, very hard to accept what feels at times like total abandoment by God.

A friend shared this excerpt from The Life of Padre Pio with me the other day:

"We can gather some faint idea of what God was working in the depths of Padre Pio's soul from the letters of this period. Speaking of his own sinfulness and wretchedness he says: "How difficult, Father, is the way of Christian perfection for a soul so ill-disposed as mine. My badness makes me fearful at every step I take" (4.7.1915). In this state of soul God often withdraws his presence for long periods and the sufferer can even believe himself lost: "Peace has been completely banished from my heart. I have become absolutely blind. I find myself enveloped in a profound night and no matter how I turn and toss I cannot find the light. How then can I walk before the Lord ? ... He has rightly thrown me among the everlasting dead whom He no longer remembers" ( 8.3.1916).

God permits, for the good of His servant, horrible temptations against faith when the soul seems no longer even to believe: "My Father, how difficult it is to believe"; and against hope: "It sees itself wholly rejected by the Lord." ( 8.3.1916). To these are added other trials of aridity and desolation through which the mystic enters more deeply into the knowledge of his own wretchedness before God and in the end feels himself forsaken by all. The devil too is let loose to plague the soul by all manner of diabolical temptations and illusions, in fact the mystic comes to feel himself so abandoned by God that he wonders whether all is not simply the work of Satan."

I do believe we are in a battle with Satan in our family. Surprisingly this gives me great courage. Instead of feeling abanonded, I feel challenged to give my all to our prayer life. All the more reason to continue in my decision to give up full time blogging and stick to weekly posts. Our prayer life, which the past month has fallen to even lower priorities that ever, needs to be revived.

How should we purge our homes?

(Click here to read the whole article, but note that this is not good reading for a young child. While one should be aware of the existence of Satan, we do need to protect the innocence of our children. )

We can pray the Rosary, says Father Fortea, "read the Bible together,
sprinkle Holy Water in the various rooms, come together before a holy image
and beg protection and so forth. The persistent prayer of a family, over the
course of several weeks or months, can completely destroy the demonic
infestation in their house."

After reading the complete article, I am more determined than ever to increase my personal prayer time and renew our family prayer life. Do I still waste time worrying. Sadly, yes. We have bills to pay and the business is still slow so please keep us in your prayers as well, as we come up on these deadlines.

Read more!

A little fun...

This past week we have been playing a game based on economics and goverment as a unit study. It is a game we are creating, to some degree, as we go along. For money we are using Monopoly bills.

Elsa, at the ripe old age of 20 months is a keen obsservor and has noted the enthusiastic passing of ten dollar, hundred dollar and even one dollar bills back and forth as we engage in the bartering for services and objects of desire.

Yesterday, as I was noting a deposit made by my eight year old daughter in our little black book (Soon to be transfered to an EXCEL program and handled by the 'banker" we 'hired' this morning.) Elsa appeared by our side gleefully waving several white one dollar bills in our faces. She carefully extricated a one dollar bill from her other fist and passed it to us with great finesse and then grinned expectantly at us. Bethany and I laughed and took the dollar bill and thanked her for her payment. She twirled on her heel and while Bethany and I speculated as to where she had found the dollar bills and whose they were she returned, more gleeful than before, and with yet a greater fistful of bills. This time she cheerfully paid us a few hundred dollars as well as a fifty dollar bill. She was very proud of her new found purchasing power. However, what she was purchasing remained a mystery to us, and she did not seem anxious to reveal it. She was just happy to keep showering us with bills.

But all good things must come to an end and the owner finally arrived to claim her much needed Monopoly money, lamented she had not yet opened a bank account and then quickly sped away with Elsa in hot pursuit, screaming her protests of what, to her mind, was nothing short of having been held up and robbed.

And now, I must keep my appointment with the new banker and show him how to post all of our accounts into an EXCEL program. Until next Friday ~ GOD BLESS
Read more!

Do you suppose...

... it is because Elsa is the youngest of twelve that her first sentence is a "telling" sentence.

"Emma do dat! Emma do dat!", pointing to her dolly and showing me that Emma had accidently broken a paper diaper on the dolly. Read more!

Emma is smitten...

Hearing that some of Miguel's friend Anthony was coming over for a visit Emma looked at me and said:
"Momma, is only big girls allowed to have boyfriends?"

To which I responded:
"Oh yes, only BIG girls have boyfriends."

To which Emma responded with a heavy sigh:
"Oh why does I have to be little???" Read more!

A fond farewell...

After great consideration and prayer, and the reality that I have a lot of paperwork that musts be done, if I am to begin earning a steady wage to help augment the business income, I have come to the sad conclusion that, at least temporally, I must hang up my blogger's hat.

I love to write, but it takes a lot of time and right now I have so much on my plate that I simply can not afford the time to write for pleasure and not for financial gain. I am beginning a home study course that will require quite a few hours of private study, as well as attendance of an out of town workshop, the auditing of a series of childbirth courses, the attendance of six births etc. Once completed, and I pass my exam, I will be a certified DOULA. I hope to also become a certified birth educator, but am starting first as a DOULA, unless I can somehow combine the studies for both things.

I also need to earn the money to pay for the books as well as the workshops etc. (Our library has only ONE of the books on our required reading list!) Therefore, come January I will begin teaching ESL (or ELP) classes again. So I also need to begin to prepare a course outline for my paying clients. I already have a few interested. And of course, I will still be homeschooling, doing tax prep for the business, making travel arrangements for the business etc, and trying to be the best mummy and wife that I can be.

I do hope to continue, on a more relaxed basis, to write reviews and keep them in "storage" so that when I can begin blogging on a regular basis again, I will have a nice back up file of reviews ready for those weeks when time, illness or life does not allow you time to write, and so be able to provide my readers a steady flow of book and movie reviews. It is my hope to maybe someday be able to provide such a steady and reliable serving of reviews that readers will be willing to support it. But financial constraints will not allow me the time to actively follow this dream at this time.

It is very, very hard to let go of my blog, even temporarily. I hope all of my faithful readers (you number well over 100!!) and will check in now and then to see if I have been able to squeeze a post in. I hope that once I have my course work out of the way, and my DOULA /childbirth practice up and running I can begin to blog on a daily basis again. I can not tell you how hard this choice is, but it must be. I will try, once a week, to post something and preferably on the same day of the week.

In the meantime, I bid you Adieu and God Bless!
I will miss you all!
And as always... prayers gratefully accepted!

Happy New Year!!

Read more!

Emma is Grieving the Christmas Tree...

On December first, only about three weeks earlier than we normally put up our tree, there was a knock on the door. Bethany (8) opened the door and there, filling the whole doorway, was a 7 foot high, possibly 4 foot wide, tree.

"What the HECK!" exclaimed Bethany, and suddenly her older sister's face popped out from behind the tree grinning like a Christmas Elf bearing gifts.

I was shocked at the earliness of it's arrival and I tried to suggest we let it 'rest' in it's stand outside on the porch, suggesting that being out in the cold might keep it healthy and fresh longer. I was outvoted by 11 to 1. The tree went up and Advent was heralded in with the need to protect the tree from one 20 month old who was more than amazed by the sudden growth of a tree in her living room. A tree that sported shiny, breakable bulbs that made such nice tikling sounds as they hit the floor. By about the 23rd, she finally lost interest. We thought.

Then yesterday, after many hours of errands outside the home, I bribed the children with a movie in hopes of speeding up the completion of the supper chores. It worked and while we were relaxing as we watched a rather old movie Elsa, sitting on her God mother's lap, innocently reached up and tugged on a bright, red, shiny apple hanging within a tempting reach.

A sudden gasp caused all heads to swivel and more gasps joined the chorus as we watched the tree swivel in what seemed like slow motion but was, in fact, too fast for us to stop it or even react. Then it toppled over and both Elsa and Gabriela dissappeared from sight in a bower of branches. Bulbs tinkled as they hit the living room floor.

Miguel appeared as if from no where and lifted the tree up revealing a rather shocked set of children who, thankfully, were none the worse for wear and someone grabbed a broom and someone else a dust pan. Within minutes we had the tree back upright and the floor swept and tidy but the decision was made for us. I had hoped to eek a few days more out of the tree. However, the tangled decorations hanging from the tree were not much to look at anymore so today - it came down.

But Emma is mourning the loss of the Christmas tree. She sat on the floor surrounded by the needles and lovingly gathered them up. Tears filled her eyes as she glared accusingly at Miguel who had done the evil deed of hauling the tree out. I was suddenly inspired both by the aroma of pine needles that filled the room, as well as the pile of them that Emma had swept up with her bare hands.

A pillow, we could make a memory of the first tree that Emma remembers. Gabriela already has a tree that she has been embroidering that we will add the numbers 2006 to and sew onto the pillow. Emma is tickled by the idea and not so sad now.

But now, you must excuse me. The kitten just knocked the bird cage over. Read more!